I never knew...

PZ. 114 "The Energetic' (The Richards Family - Porthleven pre-1948)

Em and I have been having a bit of a 'Downton Abbey Fest' recently, watching the first series on BT Vision. We missed it the first time round; I guess sumt else was on at the same time and to be honest the prospect did not appeal.

But for me the notions of atavism, ghosts, ubuntu, or summint are never far from the surface. And DA certainly pricks a few bubbles - as did the new 'Upstairs Downstairs' last year. Where are we from and who are we? I never knew...

Yes, I 'm aware that it WAS tough... and I have no doubt that "we don't know we're born", but... watching these early 1900s  period dramas brings on a feeling of loss, a certain sadness, as well as a glassy warmth of romance and starched better values(?)

I know I was a babe in the 1970s, but the very little that I recall from paternal nana Daisy's life from "Wilfred Villa" Breageside in Porthleven, is a world away from now and rings of days gone by that I never knew but possibly did get a hint of... 

I recall a pantry and 'the cabin'. I recall the smell of the cliff-side kitchen, brassware and wooden furniture. Picture rails, chair arm covers, dinner gongs. I was of course on a lower level and recall the mystery of big heavy doors with wooden(?) keyhole covers. Big warm rooms and cold hallways. Big wooden furniture, leather, silver, copper... introduced plastic that struggled to fit with the rest of the room...  Leather satchels, big warm coats - we don't wear big warm coats anymore! Cars without seatbelts, the back seat on the long trip home... the feel of plastic car-seat on my cheek... sleep.

It's only a start, I really can't recall what I might remember, who knows what we soak up when we're young... perhaps 'twas a previous life... but I DO KNOW, I never knew something...

Joy!

Joy! Warm and satisfying? Cool and fuzzy?

We made time today just to chill - we took ourselves and the kids to Bradgate for a stroll. Just walking in the fresh air was a great tonic against the noise of 'daily stuff'.
With the kids it can be* easy to make any simple thing into an adventure (*given opportunity - but that's another story). An unplanned portion of cake and a coffee helped halfway round!
Just sitting watching how the kids are growing into little people with ideas and characters of their own is grounding. Emma asked "can you see the deer?!" and P said "yes, I need a beer!" (not sure where that came from).
The clarity of the autumnal sky is striking. The seasonal adaption of nature; shrinking, slowing, fading - the moderation from the ornamentation of summer can be cleansing.
Back home we had a quick look back at some home-movie of A&P from a few years back and were reminded of the miracle of growth, and the blessings of shared experience.
Perhaps it's difficult to summarise feelings of joy? It's seems to be not an objective incident but a fleeting human feeling or thought that can either be embraced or ignored? Let's just say; if you hear a breath, absorb it; if you see a wisp, grab hold of it; if you receive anything, share it, somehow!
Joy and life will not last - if it's real, then after blooming, it may well eventually relax and rest back for a new awakening with someone else, at another time, in another place.
The tides of Mount's bay and a private Camelot will always come and go, at least in my mind they will. It's miraculous how they can be 'felt' over high fields in Charnwood. Count your blessings, name them one by one...

My only concern is that this joy seems a selfish experience, and is often not shared with others. That's what's missing... I feel that light, when kept to oneself is not true light but darkness. If it cannot be seen then it will not rejuvenate, it may as well die.
Ooops slipped, this post was intended to be a positive post.
Had a good walk amongst blue sky today! Hope you have too.
Happy days! 

Don't tell ma Cornish Cousins...

Carrot and mushrooms?! I'll be struck off!! To be honest we usually put Mushrooms in but our oggies but this time we also were short of turnip (or swede to you english) and so carrot it had to be! (carrot with a tad cardamom cumin & honey). Yup, I might as well be Devonian, the relies will not speak t'me for years! It's bad enough that I live in England! Anyway...

Beef skirt, Teddies, Onions, Carrot!? (would ideally be Turnip), Mushrooms...  

Pastry... you choose, should be short crust but them in Redruth do it different to them in Camborne...

Stick it in with a liberal mix of salt and pepper. Egg the seam.

Crimp the 'ugger! 

Ready for the range! 

Happy days! ...tomorrow!